Rien d’étonnant à ce que le rap, musique de l’ego par excellence, ait développé jusqu’à l’extrémité le genre autobiographique (avec un penchant certain pour l’autofiction), de l’introspection désabusée jusqu’à la fanfaronnade ludique. C’est même peut-être là qu’on compte ses plus grandes réussites.

‘That’s how I’m livin”, sur l’album “Home Invasion” (1993), est l’une d’entre elles. Ice-T y relate son parcours, de l’enfance au rap en passant par le business de rue, évoquant aussi l’école, l’armée, l’hôpital, la taule… Sobriété glaçante du récit, ambiance de film noir (concoctée par DJ Aladdin et SLJ) : ce morceau est parfait.

I was born in New Jersey / I said it before but I guess nobody heard me / My mother died young / No sistas or brothas, I was the only son / When I was twelve my pops died too / What’s a brotha supposed to do? / They sent me out West / To live with my aunt I guess they thought it was the best / But there was no love there / By growin’ with no moms I guess I was prepared / To live in a vacuum / The bedroom, the kitchen, the hall, the bathroom… / I didn’t leave home much / Didn’t like L.A., didn’t have no friends to trust / Got busted to a school / Blacks and whites, I guess the shit was cool / But in highschool I changed / Didn’t wanna bust, didn’t wanna play the game / I walked to Crenshaw High… / Shit was fly / I hooked up with a new crew / Some brothas that seem like they knew what the fuck to do / You might call it gang / But we called it a set and it was our own thang / The whole school was down / And one way or another everybody fucked around / Whether hardcore or not / You wore the right color or your ass got shot…

That’s how I’m livin’… (x2)

I did three years in… and made close friends / Havin’ no love my homies became my only / I was glad: the family I never had / But I grew up fast / Got a girl on 10th grade pregnant needin’ cash / I had to change my style / Switched from bangin’ for hustlin’ / No more goin’ buckwild / Had to get a cashflow / But my hustle was weak, it was a no go / I join the army / Four years in that shit, be all the fuck you can be / Came back to the hood / My homies had done good / Had elevated their game / About 100 G’s a lick, no mothafuckin’ shame / Passed for the jewels / Baby sledgehammers with the tools / I speak on this with hesitation / Even though it passed the statue of limitation…

That’s how I’m livin’… (x3)

I checked the bank / Bought a Porsche and gear and earn a high street rank / But as I grew / my whole crew fell thru / Cops had us on the books / As innerstate crooks / Murder robbery rape escape / the whole damn nine / You robbed a nigga blind / I had too much juice / I cut my boosters loose / I was in tread with the pimp game / Took on the Ice name / But the pimp game moved too slow / Especially for a nigga who was hooked on quick dough / In one night late I was in a car wreck / And I was lucky to escape / Hospital for teen weeks in bed / Almost dead / And when I got well / I got caught in a cross and got locked in a jail cell…

That’s how I’m livin’…(x2)

They cut me loose / And I had to change troops / This time they didn’t catch me / Next time they’ll stretch me / Cause my time was gettin’ short / All my homies was in court / Or locked in a hole, this shit was gettin’ old / So I changed my life / Putted down the gun, picked up the mic / It took ten years to get from there to here / But I still keep a gun / Cops got me on the run / And they hate me more now / Than they ever did before / My homies came back from the pen / And we all worked together, true friends / But every once and while some punk / mistakes me as a junk / And he gets in my face / Wrong mothafuckin’ place / And I ain’t lyin’, that’s how you’re dyin’…

That’s how you’re dyin’
That’s how I’m livin’… (x2)

Ice-T – That’s how I’m livin’

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